I was a little surprised this morning when the scale said 219, which means that I am only 10 lbs. away from my first goal. I guess that means that I am also 20 lbs. from my most important goal thus far- being under 200.
A few days ago, I adjusted my goals on Fitday. Quite frankly, I wanted to remove the stress from losing weight. For so long now, I have given myself difficult goals to reach within 3-4 month time frames. It was just too stressful to always feel as though I was failing if I wasn't losing 2-3 pounds per week, and I'm just tired of that feeling. So, I set a much more palatable goal. I am now looking to reach 190 lbs. by my birthday next year. That would be a total of 58 pounds to lose, starting with my high weight. That would mean that I am exactly halfway there, and I still have another 8 months or so to get there. I am sure that that will be more than enough time to reach that weight, and probably go lower. Still, the expectation isn't there to push lower.
Once I reach 190, I will have about 40 more pounds to lose to reach my ideal weight. I'm not sure if I feel it necessary to get down to 150 lbs. though. I think that I may be just as happy between 160-170. That would still technically put me in an "overweight" category, but I don't really care. I am not expecting my body to be what it was before having 3 children. I will be happy enough wearing size 12 or 14 jeans. It doesn't look bad at my height and proportions, especially since I tend to be so much smaller at the waist than my hips. I guess that some people would say that I have a well defined hourglass shape. Since my husband weighs in at between 150-160 on any given day, and he doesn't have his own breasts to carry around, I think that my acceptable weight range is pretty good. If I desire to lose any more weight, it will just be a happy bonus.
I am so glad to be nearing the 30 lb. mark. I had lost that much weight before, but it was a painful and dramatic change. Sure, it was wonderful to be lighter, but I did a lot of fasting to get there. I had hours of discomfort every day. I lost the majority of my weight in one month, and then switched my focus to exercise during a second month. So, while I know that I could probably starve off 15 lbs. in a month, it holds absolutely no appeal for me. I've been overweight for the past 9 years, ever since I started having children. It's not going to do me any harm to take things slow and enjoy a peaceful weight loss right now. I don't want to be at war with my body, all because I've been embarrassed about how I look.
Ah... 10 pounds seems so small now, not that it is. It just looks a lot smaller than 39. Soon, the number of pounds I have left until my first goal will be in single digits, and I am sure that that will help them to move more quickly off of my body. It is easier to make better choices when I feel excited and motivated. Being in single digits is very motivating. From there, I will work to knock off small groups of pounds, so I don't feel overwhelmed. All in all, I am looking to lose a total of about 88 lbs., and that can feel very intimidating when staring at a large number.